I have all the Brown Bakery staff cars memorized. When they pull into the parking lot at the same time as me, I can take an alternate route into the building and hide in the basement for a while. There is nothing more uncomfortable than walking into the building together and chatting about what you did last night with work humans. “I researched a Roman slave revolt and applied glitter paint to foam blocks. How about you?” I have never been good at non-business related work chat.

In related news, I was reading on Reddit about how millennial and younger people never answer their door. I find this so wild! They go to great lengths to hide or install cameras to monitor who might come to their door and knock. I cannot think of a situation where I wouldn’t answer if someone knocked on my door. Maybe if I were pooping? It feels like a cultural compulsion to me. But I’m a dinosaur.